Well, it's been a while since I've updated my friends and followers on life with two under two. You've seen me post about my fitness stuff, and I truly love writing...but the juicy stuff is what most of you like to see and hear about.
I'm convinced that someday I will write a book on my life and the chaos it entails, because I am pretty sure it would be a best seller.
In the mean time, I'll enjoy enlightening you all on my life and the fun that happens!
How did you parents in my situation make it out alive? Seriously...I thought I had it "finally" together with Noah and was adapting to being a dad of one...then Ellea came into the picture and basically put my mind in overload.
Some days I feel like my boy is the most amazing kid....and the world is a happy place...
Then there are others where I want to jump off a cliff.....
It's truly comical when I run into people outside the confines of our locked down home that we seem to never get out of(and no, it is not just due to covid). I sometimes forget what it is like to sit in a restaurant or walk walk somewhere without hearing babies whining, because venturing out with two babies is harder than trying to find toilet paper the night before a snowstorm and a COVID surge! However, when we do get out...for that brief moment, we get the same questions asked:
Them: "How are you guys....I'm sure it's hard!"
Me: Chaos
Them: Aw, yes. I get it. It will get better!
Those four words seem like a dagger to the heart. Simply because the fact that for us, it seems like it never will. The days of enjoying meals sitting down, cooking, and having a verbal conversation with my wife seem impossible. Add in the fact that I am trying to virtually restart my business and be there for the shit show of a mess for Meg's job...and you might as well pour gas on the flame burning on both our brains.
Don't get me wrong, we LOVE our kids. They are the best thing that happened to us, but in the midst of a pandemic, both of us are struggling to keep afloat with our jobs...and the fact that even if we wanted venturing for a date or trip would consist of research to find what and where to go that is even open, then risk the chance of it not working out(and for those of you who know us....those chances are VERY high).
Most of our days go the same:
During the week I have had to forgo my "morning routine" that I now find comical to be able to be "zero'd in" to work at 4 or 5am....for entertaining my son who wakes up at the butt crack of dawn regardless of how late we put him to bed. Usually it's reading, Elmo, or his banana with Suntella(a dangerous combo).
I hobble over to my laptop to start work while Meg is frantically trying to get Ellea fed, doused in 5 different lotions to calm her rash issues she is having, and then get dressed, packed up and out the door by 7am.
We both work endlessly all day to grab them and rush home for dinner at 5...we shove it in when we can and then get cleaned up, bathed and in bed by 7:30. Then we both can finally sit and work until our eyes are glazed over.
I can't tell you the last time something was on TV that wasn't sesame street.....
I'm sure this all sounds familiar to most of you. I want no pity, it's truly entertaining some nights. Trying to balance 3 jobs with many clients and my family is a tough task...and Noah can be quite the handful when he wants.
But at the end of the day, we know it is a small portion of our life. We know it will get better, and we know the chaos we are in the midst of....but some days I feel "allowed" to vent my frustrations about it.
So that next time you see Meg or I in the store without kids, don't feel the need to stop and ask us about our chaos you already know....
Instead, have a glass of champagne ready and lets pop the cap and celebrate the 5 minutes of freedom we are experiencing together, because let me reassure you....
There is NOTHING better than that feeling of busting out of the house and blaring music, feeling free, and doing SOMETHING other than baby care....which 9 times out of ten is grocery shopping.
So let me push my cart with pride and feel like I'm pushing a prowler with 1000 pounds and give me that ego boost I need...even if my cart is filled with diapers, formula, yogurts and wine!
Until they are both 3 or more....lets embrace the stress, lack of sleep, and inability to travel....then the 3+ stage will bring a new sort of fun I am sure!
Either way, I love being a dad....
But I flipping HATE COVID and what it has done to the situation and our jobs. Send us good vibes as Meg heads to Hershey Monday for Ellea to get testing done for her skin. We have tried cutting out nearly everything, and our poor daughter is itching and scratching so bad everyday.
