It's a NEW week, and a new body and mindset to approach as a long 6 days with my kids had me really think DEEP about what it really means to be a dad...
Ive gone through many spurts where I am feeling DAD OF THE YEAR and earning of this trophy ...
Then I have times where I feel worthless and that they would choose to dump me in the trash if they could.
That's the price of fatherhood. You never can be perfect, and you learn over the course of DOING.....right?
You see what worked, make changes and move on.
Many times I felt the "need" to give my kids more things to do, by constantly taking places whether it was baseball games, kids play places, Chocolate world, zoo's and endless travel to have them know daddy loves them.
I even risked taking to Sesame World ALONE and Great Wold Lodge twice! It was hard BUT they definitely still talk about those hotel trips, as I remember mainly the lack of sleep and long lines LOL
But after 3.5 years embracing the single dad life, I can honestly tell you that the more "go go go" you do with kids....
The more instability can happen when in a situation like mine.
It's NOT that these trips dont have a place and benefit, but I know some of my BEST nights are the "Sundae Fundays" where we make ice cream together or the campfires with ghost stories.
Kids DO like simple and sometimes as parents we try to overextend at our own dismay(health, happiness and sleep), to make them happy.
While serving your kids is KEY, I am one to believe that the BEST dads are ones who set boundaries and also take care of their needs.
You can't be selfish and be a good dad, but you can be proud of yourself and hold yourself to standards for your own happiness....
Otherwise look at what you are giving them?
The leftovers? The out of shape, tired and low energy dad who knows how to open paychecks but can't remember the last time he asked his kids what it would feel like to be on the other side ....hmmm.....deep.
But I know because I've been there and also coach hundreds of men each year and see this.
I see them WANTING to be good dads but not realizing what that really means.
I had a mentor and NY Best Selling Author Jon Gordon have these ten amazing tips:
1. Love is the greatest parenting strategy there is.
2. If I can't walk the walk at home, I can't talk the talk out in the world. If you don’t live it there’s no power in what you say.
3. Being a Father requires you to be a leader and manager. As the leader you share the vision of what's possible for your children and as the manager you provide the support, guidance and coaching to help them make it happen.
4. I don't want my children to be what I want them to be. I want them to become everything God created them to be. They are not my masterpiece. They are God’s masterpiece. My job is to help shape and mold.
5. A great question to ask your children... "What's it like to be on the other side of me?" Listen to their answers. They will make you a better leader and parent.
6. Parenting will give you a crash course and a lifelong lesson in patience. So often you can’t force. You must surrender and allow things to unfold.
7. If you are open to learning and growing your children will become your greatest teachers.
8. It's all about unconditional love. My children don't care how many books I write. They just want to know that I love them. It's not about who the world says you are. It’s about who you are to your children.
9. No one is perfect. The goal is to learn from your mistakes and be better today than you were yesterday. Don’t beat yourself up. Just keep learning and growing.
10. When your children fail, encourage them. When they succeed, encourage them.
It's deep yes, and all I hope help you feel special as I know many of you reading this are saying I give my best and that is all you can do each day!
But if you KNOW you are falling short, you can't beat yourself up....
You need to get help and around other dads and learn from your mistakes. I would say 90% of it starts with your own personal care and love for yourself.
DADS can't live in isolation and I've seen it wreck more and more....
So if you truly do want a way out, a way forward and a way to better fatherhood and a better body ----- I would be more than happy to help you, and give you my God given abilities to better your situation and educate you on what I've learned.
If that's you, head here.....for a limited time I am offering FREE labs when you do my 3 in 30 program for MEN only!
Stop using work and stress to be why you are tired, live to be strong and THRIVING!
Start now!
God Bless,
Mikey
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